Seeing a psychologist for the first time; is it normal to be nervous?

Written by Mitchell Hubert, Psychologist

If you are considering having your first therapy session, you may be feeling nervous or frightened about the idea of starting. Many people do not know what to expect from therapy and can feel apprehension about what to do or say. It can be incredibly daunting talking about your thoughts and feelings to someone you do not know. Beginning anything new can be a nerve-wracking experience and it is a very normal feeling to have. Below are some discussions of possible anxious thoughts one may have before starting therapy which hopefully eases these feelings and helps you become more comfortable starting your psychological journey.

What does a session look like? Your psychologist will greet you into the room and once there, will discuss the formalities of the session. This will include information about confidentiality. Discussing difficult thoughts may come with a feeling of shame and fear that other people may find out, however, a psychologist is bound by confidentiality such that what is spoken about between you and your psychologist remains between the two of you. You will be asked about your presenting issue (what motivated you to seek therapy), your symptoms and your psychosocial history (emotional, familial and relationship history). This is called an intake session and can sometimes take 1-2 sessions to gather this information.  A summary of all your information will be given along with the psychologists' impressions and general treatment plan (e.g., type of therapy, area of focus, weekly therapy, etc). This will all be done collaboratively and whether this is something you are onboard with. 

I'm concerned my psychologist will judge me. It is important to note that Psychologists are trained and aware of the difficult task of beginning therapy. Psychologists choose this career and work to understand you, not judge you. Through their years of experience, psychologists understand that psychological and interpersonal issues are a normal part of life and find it brave for one to seek support for their concerns. Your psychologist is a human being and in the modern era of psychology look at ‘what has happened to you’, rather than ‘what is wrong with you’. Your experiences in life make you who you are and with the areas you struggle with, a psychologist can work alongside you to help support a more enriching and fulfilling life.

I’m afraid of revisiting painful memories. Revisiting painful memories is frightening and you have every right to say or not say whatever it is that you want. Psychologists do not expect you to discuss your deepest secrets or memories during the first session, or even during the first phase of therapy. It is entirely up to you what you want to share and feel comfortable with. Some clients often share that they have painful memories but are not willing to share details just yet. This is perfectly normal and your psychologist will understand and be patient with you. The beginning phase can focus on the therapeutic relationship such as the trust between you and your psychologist so that you can safely gauge how you feel about opening up and sharing your past. 

Will I like my psychologist? Psychologists understand that not everyone is a good match. Of course, it may be anxiety-provoking if you do wish to change psychologists, but please understand that psychologists wish to see clients improve whether they are their own clients or not. If improvements can be made with another therapist then that is understood and they will support you in finding an alternate psychologist if possible. Some psychology practices have psychologists' profiles with a brief bio discussion of their style and therapeutic framework. It may be possible to have a brief conversation with the reception to discuss a potential psychologist you may wish to see, whether that is certain characteristics or therapeutic style. 

It may be that you are reading this post because you are thinking about beginning therapy and if that is so, then I am very proud for even making this step. Feeling nervous before starting therapy is a very common feeling and maybe a hurdle to overcome. It may be possible to reframe these nervous feelings as excitement as you are beginning to take the steps necessary in improving your well-being and creating a path to healing and personal growth.